27/08/2026
Last night I went to the movies and watched Eternal Sunshine of The spotless mind. At first, I saw this as a deep exploration of the fragile nature of love. By the end, I realised it was a poetic celebration of loving despite ourselves. I have been grateful to be in love on a few occasions now. Often my long standing love stories are the ones that found me in the embrace of love without seeking it. More recently, I have sought it, given to it, and realised that that I was not held in it. It’s been painful, but after every attempt, I have found myself being more or less ambivalent. As I sat watching the last scene of the movie, where they have revealed their most inner dislike of the other on tape when they were at their worst, I saw two people decide that it was ok. It was ok to not like each other sometimes and still be profoundly committed to something beyond the concept of themselves. I started to tear up. Beck singing Everybody’s Gotta Learn Sometime, made it very hard to breathe.
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Image: A Cottage in Leura
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