04/10/2026
🌰🥩 WHAT. A. DAY.
Drama. Hi-jinks. Allegations of cheating. Brother turned against brother. Porky nearly losing an eye. Public booing. Questionable gambling decisions. Fine art.
And, inevitably… that bloody dog.
Firstly, a huge thank you to Tracey, George, Nat, Porky and of course Clare for all their help with the Conker Contest and Meat Raffle.
Genuinely couldn’t have done it without you all. ❤️
Right. Enough warmth. Let’s discuss the violence.
🌰 THE GREAT COALBROOKDALE CONKER CONTEST
Clare had spent weeks disappearing into bushes and hedgerows gathering this year’s finest specimens.
Nat drilled them.
Señor Porque — Porky to those who’ve seen his passport — was ready.
And the people of Coalbrookdale arrived for a pleasant little charity conker competition.
It deteriorated almost immediately.
There were allegations of cheating, questionable technique, brothers fighting for family honour and one contest that went on for so long we nearly had to carry it over to next year’s tournament.
Then Porky nearly lost an eye.
Fortunately he remains binocular, although for a brief moment Señor Porque came dangerously close to becoming Señor Pirata.
Eventually, after a mere three hours, civilisation returned and we had a winner.
Last year’s champion Young Phoenix was finally toppled as Joe Cooper defeated Dean in the final to become:
🏆 THE 2026 COALBROOKDALE CONKER CHAMPION.
Phoenix handed over the trophy with the warmth of a deposed dictator being asked to vacate the palace.
Congratulations Joe, commiserations Dean and a huge well done to everyone who entered.
Because beneath all the nonsense was something genuinely worthwhile — with a little extra from behind the bar, we raised a fantastic £70 for Holy Trinity Church. ❤️
Three hours of grown adults smashing each other’s nuts together… for the church.
There are sentences you can only write in Coalbrookdale.
Then came a brief period of peace.
And at 7pm, we lowered the tone again.
🥩 THE MIGHTY MEAT RAFFLE.
Another cracking selection from Anthony’s of Wellington, another packed pub and another evening proving nothing brings a community together quite like the possibility of taking home an unexpected joint.
Bev & Ryan absolutely romped home with a TRIPLE WIN.
By that stage it was becoming less good fortune and more a redistribution of Anthony’s stock.
Jo & Stuart also got amongst the winners, before Ned committed the far more serious offence of winning in public.
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
Instantaneous. No organisation. No ringleader.
Just an entire room discovering independently that Ned’s happiness was unacceptable.
People worry Britain has lost its sense of community.
It hasn’t. It’s just waiting for Ned to win something.
But all of this was merely the undercard.
Because sitting quietly in the background was…
📦 THE BOX.
And this week we’d gone too far.
No Oxo cube. No Pot Noodles. No Fray Bentos lurking beneath a thin veneer of hope.
This was culture.
Eventually James & Liz took the gamble.
The box opened.
And Coalbrookdale entered a new cultural age.
🎨 COALBROOKDALE GOTHIC.
Glyn. Dexter. Together.
A piece nobody commissioned.
Nobody requested. Nobody realised British art was missing.
Yet somehow, the moment you saw it, everything made sense.
James & Liz very generously donated it straight back to the pub.
An incredibly kind gesture.
Although there was a definite air of “we’re not taking that bloody thing home” about the speed of proceedings.
Either way, it now belongs exactly where it should.
At the Dale. Coalbrookdale gave the world iron.
Industry. The Iron Bridge.
And now we’ve given it Glyn standing next to a St Bernard.
Some will point to Turner.
But Turner never painted a St Bernard alongside Glyn, so frankly he never really tested himself.
And you’d think being immortalised in a major work of art would be enough attention for one dog.
You haven’t met Dexter.
🐶 THE BLOODY DOG WON TWICE.
Again.
This is a dog who has previously managed to win our Meat Raffle without even being in the building.
This week he actually bothered turning up.
And won twice.
The “cheers” came. Dexter remained unmoved.
Just sat there with the serene confidence of a St Bernard who knows the humans still haven’t worked out how he’s doing it.
So there we have it.
A new Conker Champion. £70 for Holy Trinity. Bev & Ryan annexing a significant proportion of Wellington’s meat supply. Jo & Stuart heading home happy. Ned discovering exactly how conditional our love really is. Glyn accidentally entering the British artistic canon.
And Dexter continuing his hostile takeover of Sunday evenings.
A perfectly normal day in Coalbrookdale.
And if you think its calming down after that…
Absolutely not.
🍎 SATURDAY 10TH OCTOBER — APPLE DAY — 12–4PM
Before anyone arrives at the Dale carrying a Bramley and looking confused:
📍 THIS ONE IS AT COALBROOKDALE COMMUNITY CENTRE — NOT THE PUB.
A proper community afternoon with food, drink, music, crafts, apple pressing, orchard walks, apple pie competition and c***r drinking.
Essentially, Coalbrookdale has looked at the humble apple and decided eating it normally shows a complete lack of ambition.
Family friendly, loads going on and well worth supporting.
Then the following Saturday, we have one that really matters.
❤️🌻 SATURDAY 17TH OCTOBER — FOOD, MUSIC & GIVING
We’re bringing together three things the Dale does rather well:
Good food. Good music. Good people.
And using them to raise money for the Lingen Davies Sunflower Appeal, supporting people affected by cancer across Shropshire.
🍴FROM 6:30PM
Our Stuart from The Hundred House Hotel will be serving pulled BBQ brisket, Texan wedges and salad, with vegetarian options available.
Then…
🎶 MINOR GLANCE — LIVE FROM 8PM
If you caught them last time, you’ll know.
If you didn’t… correct that administrative error.
The evening is completely free to attend.
No ticket. No entry fee.
Just come down, eat, drink, enjoy the music and bring that dollar because donation buckets will be around the pub throughout the evening.
We’ve deliberately made the night free because we’d much rather see that money going into the buckets.
No gimmicks. No complicated fundraising.
Just a full pub having a brilliant night and doing some good while we’re at it.
If a group of adults hitting horse chestnuts together can raise £70 for Holy Trinity, I’d like to see what this lot can do with brisket, b**r and a band.
❤️ Let’s make this one count.
And somewhere amongst all of that, Sunday will roll around again…
🥩 The meat will arrive.
📦 The box will return.
🐶 And Dexter will presumably continue whatever criminal enterprise he’s currently operating.
October at the Dale.
Quiet little month, really.
🍺 Real flavour. Real people. Right here at the Dale.
