Conundrum Hotel

Conundrum Hotel Discover a world where life slows to a leisurely pace and worries melt away

06/29/2023

oh, dear readers, prepare yourselves for another eyebrow-raising tale from the undisclosed depths of a central florida resort hotel. picture this: a weary guest, their energy drained by a day of undisclosed theme park adventures, stumbles upon our front desk in a state of distress.

with great fervor, they recount a harrowing ordeal that took place within the theme park's magical realm. their child, unbeknownst to them, managed to acquire an entire pineapple—a fruit that, unbeknownst to the child and their parents, they were terribly allergic to. cue the dramatic anaphylactic reaction.

now, here's the kicker: this family, despite their awareness of the pineapple allergy, neglected to carry an epipen. so, while their child struggled to breathe, the passing minutes feeling like an eternity, a benevolent passerby saved the day with a benadryl tablet. remarkably, the child was able to swallow it, despite having allegedly not breathed for a whopping 20 minutes. miraculous, indeed!

enter the paramedics, who finally make their grand entrance. rather than heeding the paramedics' advice to seek further assistance at the park's guest services, our guest, fueled by anger and frustration, heads straight for the taxi stand. lo and behold, their high expectations of a waiting taxi are shattered, leaving them no choice in their minds, but to trudge their way back to the hotel on foot.

and so, with a fiery display of indignation, the guest storms away from the front desk, threatening lawsuits and hurling their discontent into the air like confetti. oh, what a joyous occasion it is to be on the receiving end of such legal threats.

stay tuned, my intrepid readers, for the saga continues to unfold. will lawsuits rain down upon us? only time will tell.

yours snarkily,
your front desk manager

06/29/2023

gather 'round, my dear readers, for another intriguing tale from the unnamed central florida resort hotel. in the wee hours of the morning, precisely 1:45am, a crass fellow hailing from the concrete jungle of new york arrives at our humble abode.

now, picture this: our irate guest storms up to the front desk, his frustration palpable. his complaint? oh, it's a doozy. verbatim, he exclaims, "what am i supposed to do, drive around until i find a parking space and then walk to my room?" ah, the sheer brilliance of his logic is truly mind-boggling.

in my infinite wisdom, i realize that simply saying "yes" to his inquiry won't do much to alleviate his mounting temper. so, i offer an alternative solution. i suggest that he can leave his precious vehicle at the front desk, and our trusty bellman will gladly whisk him away to his room. after all, it seems this grown man has never encountered the concept of a parking lot before.

oh, the marvels of human ingenuity! one might assume that navigating a parking situation is akin to cracking the enigma code. but fear not, my dear readers, for our resort is equipped with a team of bellmen, ready to chauffeur guests from point a to point b, sparing them the arduous task of, you know, walking a few extra steps.

so, there you have it—a tale of an exasperated new yorker who discovered the perplexing mysteries of parking at our resort. as we bid farewell to this saga, let us take a moment to appreciate the wonders of modern-day problem-solving and the quirks that make our job at the front desk oh-so-interesting.

until next time, my intrepid companions.

yours snarkily,
your front desk manager

06/29/2023

welcome, my friends, to another riveting tale from the depths of our unnamed central florida resort hotel. brace yourselves for a journey into the land of obnoxiousness, where manners and sobriety are but distant dreams.

imagine this scene: a guest, resembling a wild boar in human form, graces our front desk with their presence. accompanying them is their innocent, small child.

now, let me paint the picture. this delightful specimen, either drunk or naturally obnoxious, unleashes a torrent of vulgar language upon us. they demand a lavish two-bedroom villa, not for the sake of family comfort, but to entertain their "companions" while their poor child innocently wanders about. how considerate.

as if their behavior wasn't repulsive enough, they make sure the entire vicinity is aware of their alleged importance. "i'm a big shot lawyer from texas," they exclaim, their voice piercing through the air like an obnoxious siren. oh, the joys of entitled boasting.

but the saga does not end there, my friends. throughout the night, this paragon of class graces us with their presence repeatedly, each visit accompanied by escalating vulgarity and a blatant disregard for common decency. it's as if the hotel lobby is their personal stage for an impromptu performance of crudeness.

alas, a new day dawns, and the obnoxious buffoon finally decides to check out. and how do they bid us farewell? with one final, deafening declaration: "i'm off to the ritz-carlton hotel!" oh, the ritz-carlton must be positively thrilled to welcome such a delightful addition to their esteemed clientele.

so, dear readers, there you have it—a cautionary tale from the realm of hospitality's darkest corners. let it serve as a reminder that even the most glamorous destinations are not immune to encounters with the repugnant and uncouth. until we meet again.

yours snarkily,
your front desk manager

08/25/2022

so a guest had all their gift cards wrapped up in a dirty towel on their floor and housekeeping came to service the room and you’ll never guess what happened next

02/21/2022

1pm
Guest is angry because she left a case of Budweiser in the hall in front of her door for her friend and someone stole it. I verified it was not collected by housekeeping or custodial.

5pm
Guest is calling back she is still waiting for a call back from someone about finding her beer, she is not happy and doesn't want money.

9pm
Spoke to Guest, $50 credit given for missing Beer that was left outside room. Guest is in good place

02/21/2022

Friday 10pm
Guest advised they waited 4.5 hours for drinks at the pool bar. This is nowhere near accurate but as a good will gesture, we credited $200 to cover the bar tab and the time. Guest demanded more compensation.

Friday 11pm
Guest came back to the front desk a continued his rant over his anger with the staffing at the pool bar.

Saturday
Guest had unspecified encounter with resort security and the county police department.

Sunday 1pm
Guest called the front desk to continue commenting on the incompetency and understaffing of the pool bar. Guest was very irate kept screaming "why do I pay for this treatment" for 5 minutes along with "you sure take enough of my money I will be taking some of yours". Guest was very verbally abusive and would not accepted anything I said.

Sunday 7pm
Guest returned to the front desk to yell about being upset with the fact that there is only one bartender down at the pool. He was so upset that he didn't want housekeeping to make his bed.

Monday 4pm
Guest called back stating the managers at the resort have blocked his number. The Guest then threatened to go up to the front desk and make a scene. Guest is saying we are all condescending and insensitive. Guest grunted for several minutes and hung up.

02/21/2022

Guest called into the PrinceDakkarMarathon phone line. Guest is attending the half marathon occurring in less than a week. Guest is intending to race using a service animal, however has not yet been in contact with the disabilities team.The Guest has been advised to email in and we can escalate the email with that team. Guest became belligerent and abusive claiming that she is being discriminated because we're asking her to email but she has gone temporarily blind due to the multiple PTSD triggers due to our current phone call. I advised due to the guest's sudden visual impairment that I could email on her behalf and they would reach out to her ASAP. Guest advised that they don't believe me and continued scream, cursing, and claiming that she is being discriminated against. Offered to refer to our legal team but the Guest
declined. The Guest advised if they don't hear back, they'll bring their dog anyways, and "it's not a threat, it's a promise". marathon team has been notified.

11/26/2021

A guest calls in a domestic violence situation in the room next door.

The same guest calls back an hour later to complain about how the police handled the situation and their response time.

11/22/2021

when guests come locked and loaded to have lots of problems
——-

11/21/2021 06:06 PM
Guest came to desk unhappy about room assignments and insisted they were promised prefered guest showed us confirmation and it was for standard one bedroom not preferred, moved guest to higher floor closer to lobby. Guest is going to take a look at the room to see if they like it they may be back for a new room assignment if they don't like the room or location, I had Bell es**rt them to their room

11/21/2021 06:45 PM
Gst doesn't like their room because the frig isn't working and the phone in the bedroom isn't working. Looking for a change because too much is wrong with this room.

11/21/2021 07:02 PM
hotsos 2843879 gst is requesting a room. she didn't trust the "black guy" who came to fix the
refrigerator and she says it has to be on the 3rd or 4th floor. She also demands it's near the
elevator. I ask manager to take over this one.

11/21/2021 07:49 PM
Credit $90 per person for dinner breakfast due to perceived issues during booking, fridge issues, and
perceived issues from special requests

11/21/2021 10:50 PM
Guest reported a poor arrival experience due to booking process, room category and fridge cooling
issue. Engineering replaced refrigerator and Guest was provided with a credit towards a meal and comp tickets for recovery. Guest has reported similar experiences on prior visits.

11/22/2021 11:33 AM
Guest called front desk to lament to me that "what a great way to celebrate my birthday week" (her
birthday is not actually this week she is just celebrating it). I asked if she liked cake and what
kind, so we are going to send a cake with a card to her room.

11/22/2021 02:27 PM
Guest put in two more requests regarding HKSP issues and demanded a manager to talk to regarding housekeeping not wearing masks. Manager followed-up with Guest she said Guest used insulting/profane language

11/22/2021 04:19 PM
Manager was able to physically go to the room and speak with the Guest upon her concerns.
Guest wanted all new things in the room. etc.. The Guest said whatever "talk rude about us in Spanish" go ahead.

11/15/2021

per the guest, they're at a resort bus stop waiting for a bus, and the appropriate bus pulls up.

the driver opens the door and asks, "do you want to know where i'm going? !"

the guests say great and proceed to stand up from the bench to walk to the bus and the driver closes the door and drives away before they can board

11/15/2021

a guest was advised multiple times pre-arrival, at the front desk, and by housekeeping out near their room, not to leave their electric scooter unattended in a public area.

The following day the guest contacts the front desk, they left their scooter outside overnight and in the morning it was gone 🤷🏻‍♂️

11/14/2021

the front desk was assisting this returning guest first and the father became aggressive with her so she came to grab me to speak to the guest, I have helped this guest previously here and he is a constant problem to every single employee. Every time guest gets a new employee who has never helped him he shows a video of his son banging his head against the concrete which is highly inappropriate and uncomfortable for him to show cast members this. The child typically remains calm, but the father is always the one who causes a scene.

Address

12700 S Orange Avenue, Orlando
Hunters Creek, FL
32824

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